December 30, 2002 - 1:20 a.m.

Left Swinging - How Much Tighter Will The Noose Go?



There were those two weeks of happiness and bliss. I was almost giddy. Perhaps it was the new medication. Or, just being at the outpatient clinic got me out of this thick shell of depression. Now, the feeling has left me. I close my eyes and I see blood running down my body. Images of cuts across the bottoms of my feet, along my stomach and down my arms fill my head. I wish I never had those two weeks of happiness. I never agreed to with the saying that it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. I loved myself for a brief period of time, and now I despise myself. I am tortured with grief of losing that happy person. I don't think she will ever return.


Missing- Me- More- Than- You- Will- Ever- Know


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